I don’t have a smooth introduction into this. We have had a difficult time facing this reality, let alone writing about it. So, bear with me as these words stubbornly flow from my fingertips.
About four months ago, we learned that Andrew’s cancer has returned. We both lived in a state of shock and depression for a while after we were hit with this news. We’ve taken the past few months to cope with this and what it means for us. Family and close friends were told, but otherwise, we’ve intentionally kept things very quiet and private between us. Truth is, we’ve enjoyed normalcy. We’ve enjoyed having conversations with friends and strangers that didn’t center around cancer. We’ve enjoyed our leap of faith in buying our first home together, truly believing in the core of our hearts that we had beaten this disease and were free to move on with our lives. We’ve enjoyed feeling like two twenty-four year olds. We’ve enjoyed living without wondering. Andrew and I want to hold onto that as long as we can, but we know things are about to get more rocky in our lives. We have so cherished and valued the support and prayers of the community that has wrapped itself around us and we know we will desperately need that yet again.
Andrew will have to undergo a bone marrow transplant. This is an intense procedure. It has great risks, but potentially, great reward. This could be a cure. It could be an answer to prayer. It scares the heck out of me, but it’s our best option at this point. Thankfully, we have a donor. That was a huge victory in and of itself. Andrew will be out of commission for quite awhile and we would so appreciate your prayers over our next year or so. There will be some very tough days, days full of vomit and frustration. Pillowcases covered in thin, wispy hairs that have fallen off of Andrew’s head due to intense radiation and chemotherapy. Stacks of books and a Netflix queue full of movies and shows recommended by friends and family. This will be our life for the months to come. But who is ready to fearlessly face this thing head on? Andrew, of course. Sure, we both went through sadness and confusion for awhile, but Andrew has handled the idea of this next phase like he always does- like a warrior. Cancer really picked the wrong guy to latch onto. We are about to kick its butt to kingdom come. For good.
So friends, with a heavy heart from a worried wife, I ask for prayers. Prayers of praise and thankfulness, first and foremost, for God has a beautiful plan for all of this. We thought He had finished this chapter of our lives, but He has something else in mind. We welcome that, accept it, and pray for the courage to live it out as Christ sees fit. We’re so thankful for modern medicine and that something like a bone marrow transplant even exists. What a miracle. Andrew and I ask for prayers for patience, comfort, and bravery as we face the months ahead. Patience for the months to go by smoothly and quickly; (and for all of the Butler games we’re going to have to miss this season! ;) ; comfort as we truly do not understand why this is happening in our lives, but trust in the will of the Lord; and bravery as this is just plain scary. It’s terrifying to think of “what if,” but we pray for valor and boldness to be triumphant over this.
“Grace carried me here and by grace I’ll carry on.”